Kabbalah Parenting Power
Sphere 3 on the Tree represents the perfect, all-encompassing quality of Divine Understanding.
Within this level of consciousness you are perfectly understood, and exactly how to relate with you is Perfectly Understood by God. However your child behaves is based on perfect understanding of what you and your child need to go through to develop your attunement to Divine Will, which is another way of saying your total and endless fulfillment.
When parents ask their child, “Why on earth did you do THAT?” the child should say, “If you don’t understand me, how am I supposed to understand me? I’m TWO!”
As parents it is our responsibility to develop our understanding of our child in order to relate with the child in line with what the child really does need from us to lead a healthy, happy, successful life. We develop our understanding of the child by practicing NOT reacting to the child’s behavior, but instead to pause and consider the underlying need the behavior is expressing. Sometimes, what our emotional reaction tells us that the child needs is the exact opposite of what the child really needs.
For instance, the child who leaves a mess behind does not necessarily need you to complain and criticize. She may simply need you to calmly and patiently guide her back to the mess and lead her into cleaning it. By complaining to the child and criticizing the child we risk subconsciously programming the child to fail. As an example, repeatedly saying to a child, “You never clean up after yourself” programs the child to fulfill that prophecy.
To apply the parenting guideline of sphere three, consider what your child needs before reacting to what your child does.
Sphere 4 on the Tree represents Divine Mercy. All that every happens to you is an expression of perfect Divine Mercy, Loving Kindness, Forgiveness, Benevolence. You don’t have to earn anything for nothing but good to happen to you. Your every desire is destined to be fulfilled and every experience you have is leading you toward that realization. The real cause for your existence is God’s decision to bestow upon you Perfect Love Forever, for that is how perfectly Loving is God.
The fact that you do not see what a perfect gift every instant of life really is including (your child’s whining!) in now way diminishes the perfection. It is only your fear-based thinking that prevents you from seeing that gratitude is the only really authentic response to every experience. As you look at the thinking that causes you to feel less than completely fulfilled and overflowing with gratitude for the perfect state of grace that really does define creation, you will be able to let that thinking go and awaken to heavenly reality.
In your parenting, your every reaction to your child needs to be about helping your child into the realization of his or her own blessed fulfillment in life. Don’t discipline for the sake of causing your child suffering, but only to protect your child from greater suffering, and to prepare your child to realize a greater good.
Be clear about what you really want for your child, when your heart is filled with love and adoration, and align all of your parental behaviors with the accomplishment of that objective.
Envision your child as a loving, capable, secure, happy, responsible and successful human being and reject any visions of your child as a disappointment in any way. Your job as a parent comes down to aiming your best efforts to help your child realize that sacred potential.